Hooters files for bankruptcy

Now they really are bust!

Christopher Bell snags Busch Light pole at Martinsville

I hope his car wasn't dented too badly.

US FDA warns against recreational use of 'laughing gas'

"Just say no to N₂O."

This Live Theater Courtroom Drama In Los Angeles Lets You Decide The Verdict

And you can't leave until the audience is unanimous.

North Sea crash: Solong ship unlikely to stay afloat but wasn't carrying sodium cyanide, owners say

Solong, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye!

James Harrison, whose blood donations saved over 2 million babies, has died

Yet who would have thought the old man to have had so much blood in him?

'Primordial' helium from the birth of the solar system may be stuck in Earth's core

So why isn't the Earth floating in space? Oh wait, it is.

Delta Flight Ends Upside Down On Tarmac

A Delta flight, but a Nabla landing.

Severe cold forces Trump inauguration indoors, first time in 40 years

Let's hope it doesn't turn into pneumonia.

Retail theft suspects grab merchandise from Dick’s Sporting Goods in Los Angeles Co.

Why not just call them thieves?

Italy recovers Etruscan artifacts worth $8.5 million bound for black market

Holy priceless collection of Etruscan snoods, Batman!

Dorothy’s ruby slippers from Oz expected to fetch $3.5m at auction

Other ways of getting to Kansas are slower, but thousands of times cheaper.

Mariah Carey loses her mother and sister on the same day

Lady Bracknell would have called that carelessness.

Trump gunman: An 'outcast' who wasn't let on school rifle team because he was 'a bad shooter'

In more ways than one, as it turned out.

Man caught smuggling 100 snakes in his trousers

Were they the one-eyed kind?