Friday, December 13, 2019

Johnson celebrates Conservative victory

"Loves, Labour's Lost!"

Wednesday, December 11, 2019

Thousands of holes found on seafloor off California coast

"And though the holes were rather small, they had to count them all."

Friday, December 6, 2019

Wednesday, November 6, 2019

Friday, October 25, 2019

Rats find driving tiny cars relaxing, scientists report

They soon won't, once more of them join the rat race.

Monday, October 14, 2019

Friday, October 11, 2019

Shepard Smith makes shocking announcement that he is leaving Fox News

To avoid the nominal conflict of interest with his employer?

Sunday, October 6, 2019

How Do Compasses Tell Which Way Is North at the South Pole?

Very easily. At the South Pole, every way is North.

Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Iceberg larger than Los Angeles breaks off Antarctic shelf

AI has its limitations: Google News reported this as local news!

Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Tuesday, September 24, 2019

Trump says he has authorized release of transcript of call with the Ukrainian president

What's the chance that there will be 18 minutes "missing"?

Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Thursday, August 15, 2019

‘Huddled Masses’ in Statue of Liberty Poem Are European, Trump Official Says

He's right. Asians arrived through the Golden Gate, not the Golden Door.

Friday, August 9, 2019

Chicken Plants See Little Fallout From Immigration Raids

But Chicken Little sees plant fallout and cries "The sky is falling!"

Monday, July 29, 2019

Senate fails to override Trump veto of bill stopping Saudi weapons sales

Triple negatives confuse me. Can the weapons be sold, or can't they?

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Winston Churchill ‘shocked’ by Downing Street restoration plan

But bringing him back from the dead was the only way to solve Brexit.

Thursday, May 30, 2019

Monday, April 22, 2019

What people don’t get about why planes crash

It's called gravity, and no-one really knows what causes it.

Thursday, April 11, 2019

Wednesday, March 27, 2019

May to quit once Brexit has been delivered

At the rate she's been going, that won't be any time soon.

Saturday, February 16, 2019

Airline Bookings to Offer New Gender Options

Trans World Airlines flies again!

Sunday, February 3, 2019

Saturday, February 2, 2019

Monday, January 28, 2019

McDonald's and KFC warn of shortages and price hikes if there's no Brexit deal

Hey, at least that would improve the nation's health.

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Dead baby found at Amazon distribution center

Returned by an unhappy purchaser?

Sunday, January 13, 2019

Theresa May says no Brexit more likely than no deal

So "no deal" is now the likeliest Brexit?