Thursday, September 3, 2009
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Obama's plan to speak to schoolchildren ignites furor in Dallas area
Because he doesn't plan to drive there in an open motorcade?
Announcement
I'm changing the layout of the blog. From now on, each headline will appear in a separate post, instead of combining each day's headlines into a single post. This way, you'll get them sooner. Hope you like the change.
More Headlines: Sep 2
Hijackers shoot dead cop
- Waste of a bullet.
Nearly 1 in 10 California seniors failed to pass high school exit exam
- After so many years, does it matter?
Freed journalists suspect they were trapped
- Yes, that's what "freed" implies.
Slim majority oppose Obama's health-care plan
- Naturally. They're the ones who least need it.
At 40, the Internet still reshaping history
- Thanks to Wikipedia, anyone can rewrite it.
Domestic battery case dropped against porn star
- Her vibrator's external power source?
Road widening can't go on forever, state leaders say
- Obviously not, or they won't have any state left.
Ancient wall found in Jerusalem
- What, another one?
BP Makes Gulf Oil Discovery
- Gulf Oil, however, has always known about BP.
Michael Jackson's estate will pay funeral costs
- Glad to see he died within his means.
- Waste of a bullet.
Nearly 1 in 10 California seniors failed to pass high school exit exam
- After so many years, does it matter?
Freed journalists suspect they were trapped
- Yes, that's what "freed" implies.
Slim majority oppose Obama's health-care plan
- Naturally. They're the ones who least need it.
At 40, the Internet still reshaping history
- Thanks to Wikipedia, anyone can rewrite it.
Domestic battery case dropped against porn star
- Her vibrator's external power source?
Road widening can't go on forever, state leaders say
- Obviously not, or they won't have any state left.
Ancient wall found in Jerusalem
- What, another one?
BP Makes Gulf Oil Discovery
- Gulf Oil, however, has always known about BP.
Michael Jackson's estate will pay funeral costs
- Glad to see he died within his means.
Headlines: Sep 2
Bank robber: I did it to get away from wife
- Yeah, right.
US dinosaur had Chinese cousin
- Back then, they were neighbors.
Blast Kills Afghan Intelligence Official
- So much for Afghan intelligence.
Hunt on for Indian politician after chopper vanishes
- Perhaps he went to bury the hatchet?
N.Y. Wrong-Way Driver to Be Exhumed
- Was she buried the wrong way too?
Gay marriage critics file for DC referendum
- Wouldn't an AC/DC one be fairer?
SkyEurope collapse hits passengers
- They should have heeded Chicken Little.
Donor says he got $20,000 for kidney
- Wow! How much would a seller have got?
Report: Woman blames shoplifting on her weight gain
- Which in turn she blames on her bank-robbing husband?
- Yeah, right.
US dinosaur had Chinese cousin
- Back then, they were neighbors.
Blast Kills Afghan Intelligence Official
- So much for Afghan intelligence.
Hunt on for Indian politician after chopper vanishes
- Perhaps he went to bury the hatchet?
N.Y. Wrong-Way Driver to Be Exhumed
- Was she buried the wrong way too?
Gay marriage critics file for DC referendum
- Wouldn't an AC/DC one be fairer?
SkyEurope collapse hits passengers
- They should have heeded Chicken Little.
Donor says he got $20,000 for kidney
- Wow! How much would a seller have got?
Report: Woman blames shoplifting on her weight gain
- Which in turn she blames on her bank-robbing husband?
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Headlines: Sep 1
Gay to have surgery after season
- Competing in the Women's League next year?
Report: Murdered Pastor Left Nude in 'Crucifix Position'
- What a place to leave one! No wonder she was struck down.
Hamas leader denies Nazi genocide of Jews
- He wants to take the credit for himself?
Next Atlanta mayor could be white
- Why not? It's happened before...
911 Tapes Released in Ga. Trailer Park Murders
- But the 912th is still a suspect.
Libya says Lockerbie bomber in hospital
- Oh, so now they admit he was the bomber?
Nigeria Indicts 5 Ousted Bank Chiefs
- Good. Maybe now they'll stop emailing me about dormant accounts.
'I just think about climate change all the time. It's all I do'
- Get a life.
1 in 3 teenage girls tell of sexual abuse
- Fortunately, 2 in 3 still keep quiet.
Boeing Makes Executive Change
- Enforcing the company dress code across the board, I see.
Ban on production of old light bulbs begins
- Why ban the impossible?
UK teenage girls 'worst drunks'
- That's why I prefer older lushes.
TV Chef Pleads Guilty To Hare Coursing
- The traditional Jugged Hare recipe is now illegal.
- Competing in the Women's League next year?
Report: Murdered Pastor Left Nude in 'Crucifix Position'
- What a place to leave one! No wonder she was struck down.
Hamas leader denies Nazi genocide of Jews
- He wants to take the credit for himself?
Next Atlanta mayor could be white
- Why not? It's happened before...
911 Tapes Released in Ga. Trailer Park Murders
- But the 912th is still a suspect.
Libya says Lockerbie bomber in hospital
- Oh, so now they admit he was the bomber?
Nigeria Indicts 5 Ousted Bank Chiefs
- Good. Maybe now they'll stop emailing me about dormant accounts.
'I just think about climate change all the time. It's all I do'
- Get a life.
1 in 3 teenage girls tell of sexual abuse
- Fortunately, 2 in 3 still keep quiet.
Boeing Makes Executive Change
- Enforcing the company dress code across the board, I see.
Ban on production of old light bulbs begins
- Why ban the impossible?
UK teenage girls 'worst drunks'
- That's why I prefer older lushes.
TV Chef Pleads Guilty To Hare Coursing
- The traditional Jugged Hare recipe is now illegal.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Headlines: Aug 31
Spider phobia treatment goes online
- But arachnophobes won't touch the Web.
China's 'unluckiest generation' reflects on cost of revolution
- And on its pronunciation?
New Orleans Sees an Opportunity to Improve on Its Past
- That won't be difficult.
Texas law makes Sept. 11 a holiday for firefighters
- And a field day for arsonists?
Economists Are Split on Inflation
- Next time, don't blow them up so hard.
Baker Hughes to Buy BJ Services
- Does his wife know?
Heavier Drinking Linked to Heavier Exercise
- If elbow-bending counts...
Conn. Man Advertises Parents on Craigslist for $155
- Is there an extra “n” in that headline?
Therapist charged with having sex with 14-year-old
- And isn’t there a space missing from this one?
EU to begin phasing out standard lightbulbs
- Once again, the lights are going out all over Europe.
- But arachnophobes won't touch the Web.
China's 'unluckiest generation' reflects on cost of revolution
- And on its pronunciation?
New Orleans Sees an Opportunity to Improve on Its Past
- That won't be difficult.
Texas law makes Sept. 11 a holiday for firefighters
- And a field day for arsonists?
Economists Are Split on Inflation
- Next time, don't blow them up so hard.
Baker Hughes to Buy BJ Services
- Does his wife know?
Heavier Drinking Linked to Heavier Exercise
- If elbow-bending counts...
Conn. Man Advertises Parents on Craigslist for $155
- Is there an extra “n” in that headline?
Therapist charged with having sex with 14-year-old
- And isn’t there a space missing from this one?
EU to begin phasing out standard lightbulbs
- Once again, the lights are going out all over Europe.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Headlines: Aug 30
Thousands mourn Iraqi Shia leader
- Millions don't.
Fort Bliss soldier charged with murder incompetent for trial
- But not for military service?
Garrido admitted to drug-fueled sex fantasies
- How come they never let me in?
Mentally ill woman shot by cops sues
- Are they like gangsters molls?
Kidnapped Girl Etched in Tahoe Community's Heart
- You can still see her artwork on Main Street.
Experts: Media today would demand Chappaquiddick answers
- Kennedy today would not give them.
What happens to your virtual world after you die?
- Your Second Life goes on.
TV chat show star Simon Dee dies
- Simon Dee ceased.
Why is blood so costly?
- Well, would you want to use cheap blood? Thought not.
- Millions don't.
Fort Bliss soldier charged with murder incompetent for trial
- But not for military service?
Garrido admitted to drug-fueled sex fantasies
- How come they never let me in?
Mentally ill woman shot by cops sues
- Are they like gangsters molls?
Kidnapped Girl Etched in Tahoe Community's Heart
- You can still see her artwork on Main Street.
Experts: Media today would demand Chappaquiddick answers
- Kennedy today would not give them.
What happens to your virtual world after you die?
- Your Second Life goes on.
TV chat show star Simon Dee dies
- Simon Dee ceased.
Why is blood so costly?
- Well, would you want to use cheap blood? Thought not.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Headlines: Aug 29
Kidnapping Suspect Admitted to Disturbing Sexual Fantasies
- Whose did he disturb? Or was he admitted?
India loses contact with Moon satellite
- It's gone round to the Dark Side?
Man, 23, gets 2 life terms plus 100 years in kidnapping case
- And then to be fined £40?
Pakistan suicide bomber training camp destroyed
- By overeager trainees?
Man stole woman's car on date
- He wanted her body and her chassis.
Safety drives over bank holiday
- All very well, but can he keep Death off the roads?
‘Halloween II’ is a vile sequel to a lazy remake
- Is that criticism or praise?
GM Sees Chevy Inroads in Europe
- Are those pickups or SUVs?
Halting Recovery Divides U.S. in Two
- Like the Mountain Range, the economy is rocky.
Banks deemed too big to fail emerge even bigger
- Ultimately they'll fall even harder.
First Lady visits Aids clinic
- Had to happen sooner or later. Disease is no respecter of rank.
Mega Millions jackpot hits $333 million
- Big deal. That's only a third of a Mega Thousand.
Woman's frantic 911 call helps convict her killer
- I suppose it was of some use in the end.
Californians Sweat Out Wildfires
- A new way to save water?
Apple: Exploding iPhones Not Our Fault
- Then whose? Suicidal eJihad apps?
- Whose did he disturb? Or was he admitted?
India loses contact with Moon satellite
- It's gone round to the Dark Side?
Man, 23, gets 2 life terms plus 100 years in kidnapping case
- And then to be fined £40?
Pakistan suicide bomber training camp destroyed
- By overeager trainees?
Man stole woman's car on date
- He wanted her body and her chassis.
Safety drives over bank holiday
- All very well, but can he keep Death off the roads?
‘Halloween II’ is a vile sequel to a lazy remake
- Is that criticism or praise?
GM Sees Chevy Inroads in Europe
- Are those pickups or SUVs?
Halting Recovery Divides U.S. in Two
- Like the Mountain Range, the economy is rocky.
Banks deemed too big to fail emerge even bigger
- Ultimately they'll fall even harder.
First Lady visits Aids clinic
- Had to happen sooner or later. Disease is no respecter of rank.
Mega Millions jackpot hits $333 million
- Big deal. That's only a third of a Mega Thousand.
Woman's frantic 911 call helps convict her killer
- I suppose it was of some use in the end.
Californians Sweat Out Wildfires
- A new way to save water?
Apple: Exploding iPhones Not Our Fault
- Then whose? Suicidal eJihad apps?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
