Senate approves apology to American Indians

Will they have Letterman read it on his show?

Grant seals return to Portsmouth

Already?  Winter is arriving early this year.

Giant Dust Ring Is Discovered Around Saturn

Is the planet's vacuum cleaner broken?

Pirates attack navy ship 'in error'

Gilbert and Sullivan would have had a field day with that one...

Survey says: 3 out of 10 prefer cell phones over sex

They're the ones whose phones vibrate?

Probe Launched Into Deadly River Pollution

Within minutes, it dissolved.

More motorists die on rural roads

...because urban traffic is so sloooooow.

Convertibles 'bad for the ears'

... and disastrous for the hair.

Brain Waves Surge Moments Before Death

Yes, it's your life flashing before you.

Food vendor collapses and dies in Dodger Stadium press box

PS: Anyone want 100 boxes of Cracker Jack?

Inmate relives pain of botched execution

He's lucky to be able to...

Embattled Letterman tells 'Late Show' audience he's trying to save marriage

He's joking, of course.

United tries $249 fee to check bags for a year

Does it cost more if you want them back sooner?

Girl's starvation death 'was preventable'

Yes, it's called 'food'.

Man released from death row, dies in crash

Statistically, the highways are riskier than death row...