Patients wait an average of 35 hours at L.A. hospital ER, complaint says

If they can wait that long, they don't need to be there...

Debt poses 'existential threat' to State

This calls for an expert in PPE.

Destruction of ancient forests at lowest level for 20 years, says UN

I blame the recession.

Pope Benedict places blame for sex scandals on Catholic Church

Whatever happened to "The Buck Stops Here"?

Man killed friend to avoid drug rap, court hears

Well it worked...sorta.

McGinn touts push to get people out of cars

And into the McGinn joints?

Egg donors are paid too much, study says

By definition.

Pope Benedict says sex abuse crisis is 'terrifying'

He should have more faith.

MSPs support new Forth crossing

A third Forth crossing?

Medical Marijuana Shops Firebombed

... and crowds form downwind.

BP hopes 'top hat' will succeed where dome failed

And if that fails, there's always duct tape...

Number of Abandoned Children in Haiti Skyrockets

How much does that affect liftoff?

Iceland Volcano Causing Travel Nightmare Once Again

Has BP got another giant dome to spare?

Australia well-placed to withstand economic turmoil

Yes, about as far from Greece as you can get.

Goodwill donations in Fort Worth range from sex dolls to hand grenades

In fact, anything that blows up.